The Great by Tony McNamara

Author:Tony McNamara
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Currency Press

SCENE THIRTEEN

Catherine’s quarters.

CATHERINE and HERMES gambol about.

HERMES: You are in high spirits today.

CATHERINE: I believe I am. Here’s a topic. You and me and the future.

HERMES: I like the sound of that.

CATHERINE: What about children?

HERMES: Never liked them, they’re small and tend to get drunk too fast to be good companions.

CATHERINE: Would you have them with me?

HERMES: I don’t think Peter would be pleased. But I will risk it and begin at once.

He starts to scurry under her dress. She laughs. MARIAL enters.

MARIAL: Peter approaches.

HERMES scurries under her dress completely.

CATHERINE: What are you—?

PETER enters.

PETER: My dear wife.

CATHERINE: Hello. How are you?

PETER: To be honest, a little troubled. There is talk of talk.

CATHERINE: There is?

PETER: A possible coup. Fuckers, plotting against me. Me? Who’ve been nothing but kind… You try to be good to people and… Anyway, fuckers are going to be wearing their livers for hats when I get done.

CATHERINE: Do you know who?

PETER: Orlo and the General are looking into it.

CATHERINE: Good.

PETER: Anyway, just wanted to let you know. I doubt they’ll come for you. Since it is your coup, that would seem disorganised.

CATHERINE: I don’t know what you’re—

PETER: Just testing. I have given Hermes two guards, they go with him everywhere, except when he is with you.

CATHERINE: I noticed that. Thank you for protecting him.

PETER: If a move against me is made, screams are heard, people are running in hallways their clothes sprayed with blood, or even just a vague certainty of moves afoot, they will cut his throat to the hard part at the back of his neck.

CATHERINE: What?

PETER: The cunt’s dead.

CATHERINE: I…

PETER: You what? Do not wish that to happen? I imagined you wouldn’t. We have engineered a suitable arrangement I thought.

CATHERINE: Do not.

PETER: Do not, yourself! I will leave you now, you have things to do. We should talk about children sometime.

He exits. She is left standing there. HERMES backs out of there.

HERMES: Damn, can’t hear a thing under there. You jammed your legs together so hard my ears hurt. Ow.

She stares at him.

How is he?

CATHERINE: Mad.

HERMES: No change, then. Champagne.

She stares at him while he gets the bottle and pours.

CATHERINE: You know what I love about you?

HERMES: I’m handsome, witty and can make a noise exactly like a chicken caught in a fence?

CATHERINE: You always make me smile. No, I love that you have lived.

HERMES: I pride myself on it. I like to think if I died tomorrow I would be happy.

CATHERINE: I like to think that to.

Beat.

HERMES: Catherine?

CATHERINE: They are not guards. They are not protecting you. You are their hostage.

HERMES: They’re going to kill me?

CATHERINE: Unless I stop the coup against Peter.

HERMES: There’s a coup? Where have I been?

CATHERINE: Enjoying your life.

HERMES: You knew this?

CATHERINE: Yes.

HERMES: Wow.

CATHERINE: Wow?

HERMES: I don’t know what it means, it just came out. Wow.

CATHERINE: I think it is right.

HERMES: So you have to stop the coup. Will it be hard? Do you know who’s behind it?

CATHERINE: I am behind it.

HERMES: Whew. Wow. That had me worried, tense moment, need a drink, look at the hairs on my arms, and my heart.

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